Mutant Girl Letra

To the corner bar, down the road,
It's got the best single girls, I'm told.

I find me a lady, nice and sweet,
I offer her a drink, and she thought I was neat.

We talk for awhile, and then she said,
She wanted me to take me her home to her bed.

I said okay and off we go,
to spend the whole night in her condo.

I wanted to sex her, but was stuck in a rut,
Because I discovered that...

She had a what?!?!?

Chorus: She's got a what?

So I got upset and I left her place,
It's just too bad, she had a pretty face.

Her hair was dark, big and long,
But she had something extra and I said "So Long"

So I went back home and drank myself to sleep,
That was just one memory I didn't want to keep.

I woke up the next afternoon at four,
I needed some smokes, so I went to the store.

But that mutant girl I dated was there too,
I tried to leave, but she saw me by the brew.

She asked me why I ran away last night,
I couldn't explain because I was in fright.

She demanded an answer, and I tried to lie,
But she didn't believe me, she didn't even try.

So she knocked me down to the floor with a hook.
She raised her long skirt and made me look.

Chorus: She's got a what?

She said if that's why I left her last night.
I confessed yes, and she said alright.

She laid on top of me and gave me a kiss,
I never encountered such a mutant girl like this.

She pressed her bottom down smack against me.
She didn't have just two legs, man, she had three.

Her breasts were huge and her body was long,

I couldn't leave because she was too strong.

But all this smothering began to feel good,
I was getting horny as a straight man should.

And then my own third leg began to grow,
It was getting mighty hot below.

I just couldn't hold it back anymore,
We then made love in the liquor store.

The owner came up to us and he got sick,
He saw me making love with a mutant chick.

He had a heart attack and then he died,
We were open about our love, why should we hide?

We went on more dates and I took her everywhere,

Then at a theme park, I proposed to her.

We soon got married and we had a lot of babies,
We had more fun than a barrel of monkeys.

One kid had four arms, another kid had six,
Another had three legs, and one boy had two...um, extra legs.

One had 12 fingers as well as 12 toes,
Why they were like that, nobody knows.

One had two noses, and one had four ears,
One girl had a chest just like Britney Spears.

My family is weird, but I like it that way,

And so that's the end. I must go away.