Print

I have a complicated relationship with the distal portionOf my large intestine, also known as the colonI started feeling kinda shitty when I turned 23And then the pain got worse and worse every dayAnd the days turned into weeksI finally went to see the doctor and I pooped into a cupAnd then a few weeks after that he stuck this camera up my buttThe camera was in a tube, and the tube pumped out airSo that my colon could inflate and they could look around in thereWhen I woke up the doctor was looking at my chartI called his attention to me with a fifteen minute fartHe said "Son I hate to tell you cause I know you're not gonna like thisBut they got a name for what you have and it's called ulcerative colitisAnd in those seven syllables there's a mess of shitty newsIt's likely that you've had your last healthy-feeling poosIt's like road rash on your colon, you'll bleed and it'll hurtAnd no one knows what causes it and there is no cureAnd yeah your chances of cancer have gone up a bitBut colon cancer's curable if you keep your eye on itBut mostly what will piss you off is how you're gonna payI know you're not insured and you'll probably stay that wayLetras de cancionesSee insurance companies hate to deal with sick folks like youThey don't like taking money from folks they might have to give it back toAnd your pills are gonna cost you both your arms and at least one legI suggest you go to Canada and get on your knees and begBecause here the costs are as high as the market can bearAnd they can bear a lot compared with soiled underwear"I laid there on that bed and thought how I used to like to pooI thought maybe there was a mistake, how could this be trueI asked the doctor, pleading, begging if he was really sureAnd if he was how could it be that there really was no cure"The only cure we have," he said, "is to take the whole thing outAnd then to get your movements out we install a little spout"I told him that I'd rather take a thousand thousand dollar pillsHe agreed and sent me home with some similar sounding billsNow really all I've learned, besides the importance of fiberIs the health care system's more screwed up than a fifty year old Fred subscriber From Letras Mania